What do love and economics have in common?

Just recently while looking through some old documents I found my high school reports. I was surprised to see that I got top of my class in economics. I did enjoy the subject but didn’t pursue it any further beyond school.

Then today I was thinking about my Mum who passed away ten years ago. Over the years I tried to demonstrate my love and appreciation of her. Did I succeed in showing my love for her? I will never really know.

Then I got to thinking that love (as well as economics) responds to supply and demand to some degree. I tried to show my love through my words, gifts and time spent with her. That is what makes me feel loved.

Have you ever come across a book called “The Five Love Languages” by Dr Gary Chapman? The five languages are very briefly described as follows:

  • Words of affirmation
  • Quality time
  • Receiving gifts
  • Acts of service
  • Physical touch.

The book suggests that if we know the other’s love language we can learn to say and do the right things to make the special someone feel loved.

When we randomly respond to people by doing and saying what we ourselves want to hear and receive we may just miss the point.

Just with supply and demand in the economy we can be more successful if we are in tune with what our loved ones desire. Now I don’t claim to have a handle on this but thinking about it helped me see where relationships break down and misunderstandings can occur.

We mean well and love as best as we can and hopefully our good intentions are recognised.

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The mind journey to work …

I am startled awake by the alarm
I get up and methodically eat and get ready for work
I don’t want to go – not really – don’t feel up to it.
I must go – just deal with getting to work
Then deal with getting started
Drive to my next location – notice the colours of the cars
Be in the moment
Be friendly and do what I have to do
Remember that life is about love – be loving – be friendly
Pretend to be confident – no-one will know I am pretending
Enjoy the sunshine – relax into it
Drive to the next location
Try and do a good job – be loving
It gets easier as the day progresses
Healed by the warm sunshine and warm smiles
Do what I need to do – be kind
I am grateful for a good day.

Passionfruit flower PS

Writing Styles

I recently re-read Lady Chatterley’s Lover by D.H.Lawrence. I was surprised that I still found it to be a bit raunchy even in the 21st Century. I moved on to another of Lawrence’s books – this time it was Women In Love.

For your information, David Herbert Richards Lawrence was born on 11 September 1885 in Eastwood, Nottinghamshire, England.

D.H. Lawrence

I was fascinated with the beauty of his writing as it is so different to most of the novels I read.

Here is a sample:

She was a strange figure in the class-room, wearing a large old cloak of greenish cloth, on which was a raised pattern of dull gold. The high collar, and the inside of the cloak, was lined with dark fur. Beneath she had a dress of fine lavender-coloured cloth, trimmed with fur, and her hat was close fitting, made of fur and of the dull, green-and-gold figured stuff. She was tall and strange, she looked as if she had come out of some new, bizarre picture.
(Women In Love by D.H. Lawrence, pp.40-41 Penguin Books)

Alas, I confess I didn’t last the distance. I love the language and the style but it was too intense for me. Maybe I will have another go on another day :-).

Choose Joy

I find it easy to become discouraged by so much bad news every where we look. For the next 24 hours I will focus on the many good things and people there are in the world 🙂

 

JOY

A story about an old man (fiction)

old manI visit my elderly aunt every week. She is in the dementia ward of the local Care Village. She turned ninety recently. I notice each week that there is a fellow sitting outside enjoying the sunshine. He has a beautiful smile and says hello to me as I pass by.
As time goes by, we start to exchange a few words about the weather or comment on the flowers in the well-cared for grounds.

Sometimes my aunt is agitated and doesn’t want to see me so I spend a bit more time with ‘the old man’ sitting outside. One day I introduce myself as Jenny and he tells me his name is Bill. Bill is also in his early nineties but he still has his wits about him. I often wonder about his past as he doesn’t seem to have any visitors and he doesn’t give much away about himself. He always asks after me and my family though. I can tell by the lines on his face that he has seen a lot in his life – not all of it has been good either.

Over the next weeks and months we get to know each other a little better. My aunt doesn’t even know who I am now but I still visit once a week and tend to spend a bit more time chatting to Bill. He tells me what mischief my aunt has been up to over the previous week. She keeps wanting to go home and tries to escape at every opportunity.

One day, I will muster up the courage to ask him to tell me a bit more about his life. He prefers to be the one asking the questions.

It just so happened that my most recent visit fell on Father’s Day. My Dad passed away some time ago and I spontaneously bought a box of chocolates for Bill. I didn’t want to embarrass him, so I casually gave them to him, saying, ‘I thought you might like these, Bill’. I was a bit nervous as I was unsure how he would respond. He was very quiet at first, then I noticed his eyes brimming with tears. I touched his hand and sat quietly beside him.

‘It is so kind of you, Jenny. I want to share something with you – if you have the time?’

‘Of course, Bill’, I replied.

He sat quietly and I could tell he was summoning up the courage to speak. He said, ‘I always look forward to your visits. I know that you really come to see your aunt, but I like to think that you come to see me too. You see, I don’t have any family. My parents died years ago and I had no brothers or sisters. I married a beautiful girl, Kathleen and we had a daughter called Jenny – just like your name.’

Bill paused again to catch his breath and then continued, ‘When Jenny had her tenth birthday we took her to the Zoo as a special treat. She really loved nature and especially animals. It was on the way home that our lives changed forever. A drunk driver went through a red light and smashed into our car. Kathleen and Jenny died that day’. He paused again, tears rolling freely down his cheeks now.

He went on, ‘I was in a coma in hospital for two weeks after the accident. When I came around and they told me about Kath and Jenny, my world fell apart. I didn’t want to go on living without them. Physically I got better over time but I was emotionally dead from that point on. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months and years. The pain is still with me today, like it happened yesterday. However, I slowly learned to see the good in the world again. That is why I like to sit outside and look at the gardens and watch the birds. And now I am an old man.

Your kindness is like a ray of sunshine in my life. Please forgive me for my emotional outburst today, but it is so long since anyone has shown me such kindness. Thank you Jenny.’

I was very moved by what Bill told me and I wrapped my arms around him and no words were needed.

 

Weekly Photo Challenge: Treasure

When I got up this morning I came across my little teddy bear that my Mum gave me many years ago. I spent a few moments just looking at it and remembering her.

I used to collect teddy bears of all shapes, sizes, textures and colours. My Mum wasn’t one for collecting pretty things. I remember she hated ribbons on dresses and used to cut them off! So I was very surprised one day when I was visiting her and she gave me this little knitted bear. She said, ‘I saw this, and thought of you.’

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It isn’t the prettiest bear, but the fact that Mum thought of me and bought it for me, makes it a real treasure in my eyes.

PS I still have my bear collection and have been tempted to give them away on many occasions but I can’t bring myself to part with them 🙂

My fridge magnets

Actually they are on my filing cabinet really 🙂

1. One day as a TIGER is worth thousands as a SHEEP

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2. Chill out!

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3. God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change

Courage to CHANGE the things I can

And WISDOM to know the difference

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4. DANCE as though no-one is watching you

LOVE as though you have never been hurt

SING as though no-one can hear you

LIVE as though heaven is on earth

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5. Go confidentially in the direction of your dreams

Live the life you have imagined (Thoreau)

On the look out for whales in Geographe Bay in October

On the look out for whales in Geographe Bay in October 2013

 

Christmas Pudding

My mother-in-law taught me how to make Christmas Pudding in the way she prepared and cooked it every year for her husband and two sons. The responsibility was passed to me when she passed away in 2010. Each year I say I am not going to make it but I usually give in to howls of protests.

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The tradition of putting the coins in the puddings comes from my childhood. I have 15 x three-penny coins dating from 1921 to 1955. I also have seven six-penny coins dating from 1910 to 1963. I always clean them in boiling water and bicarb soda before mixing them in the pudding! I usually ask the coins be swapped for some chocolate money so as I can continue the tradition the next Christmas.

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Next the mixture goes in two pudding bowls and sealed with kitchen paper and foil before inserting into two pots of boiling water.

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Then they steam for four hours. I need to keep topping up the water so it does all disappear 🙂

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