About the foolishness of worrying …

Recently I discovered image quotes and find them to be quite therapeutic. I read dozens of them until I find one that hits the spot for where I am now at. Here is today’s choice:

umbrella

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Wasted days and wasted nights

Tell us your tried and true techniques for focusing when that deadline looms and you need to get work done. In other words, how do you avoid wasted days and wasted nights?

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To find a way through the overwhelming confusion, I will usually do a mind map – basically writing down every possible thing that is on my mind. Often I will cover a page and it doesn’t have to be neat. Then I may group some sections together using different coloured highlighters. They may be a group based on topics such as: jobs needing doing in the house, assignments due, appointments to be made or to be kept.

When my page is sorted into chunks I will then put them through the following:

URGENT/IMPORTANT

URGENT/NOT IMPORTANT

NOT URGENT/IMPORTANT

NOT URGENT/NOT IMPORTANT

As you would expect, I then deal with the URGENT/IMPORTANT tasks first, taking one at a time.

Another strategy may be to negotiate for more time if you have a legitimate reason. You need to be kind to yourself and not apply too much pressure. By being under pressure and stressed, it will impact on your ability to do the task anyway – it may even block you from getting started.

When all procrastination is out of the way – just put one foot in front of the other and start doing what needs to be done!

 

Old advice is not always good advice …

John_Longstaff_-_Breaking_the_News,_1887Many years ago I had an episode of depression and sought help from a therapist. There is one main piece of advice I have always remembered and it helped me tremendously over the years.

The advice was keep involved and don’t stop doing things. At the time is was the exact opposite of what I felt like doing. I wanted to withdraw into a quiet space and tell the world to go away. I followed the doctor’s advice, probably more so with my career. I don’t think I ever missed a day’s work due to depression. No-one at work was aware that I had any concerns. I can put on a good face that all is well!

I am grateful that I was able to keep working full-time over 17 years with the state government. It has allowed me to take an early retirement. Interestingly though, the advice I was given years ago seems to be a little redundant now. I only realised recently that I have developed an excessive habit of keeping busy to ward off any signs of depression.

Given that my lifestyle now doesn’t have the pressures and demands of the past, it seems I can let down my barriers a little and not be on the defensive and fearful that depression may sneak up on me. I have always been very aware how important it is to get the right balance in my life. Too much stress can definitely set one up for an episode of depression however not enough challenge in life is just as concerning.

Life is an ongoing learning process, isn’t it?

cheers

Lorraine

 

 

Do you have an inner wimp?

I do and I am not happy about it!

IMG_0002 (Copy) I sometimes get angry with myself when I allow my inner wimp to have its way. I feel ashamed of myself when I take the easy way out and avoid a situation. I shared this with a friend and she suggested that we all experience this from time to time. I am reminded that when I try to resist something it only becomes a stronger force within me. I think it is time I had some compassion for that wimpy part of me. I can’t see it having any useful purpose but, who knows, it may well be doing some good.

What do you think?

cheers

Lorraine

Well-being

nineteen

Townsville, Queensland 2012

SUMMARY OF WELL-BEING THEORY: “Here then is well-being theory: well-being is a construct; and well-being, not happiness, is the topic of positive psychology. Well-being has five measurable elements (PERMA) that count toward it: Positive emotion (of which happiness and life satisfaction are all aspects) Engagement, Relationships, Meaning and Achievement. No one element defines well-being, but each contributes to it.”  Source: Seligman, Martin (2011-05-02). Flourish (p. 24). Random House Australia. Kindle Edition. asn.

The information above is a cut and paste from Seligman’s latest book. Is it a formula for the good life? It does seem to be a balanced and considered theory. To put it into my own language, I believe I experience well-being when: 1. I experience positive emotion i.e.  feel happy and am reasonably satisfied with my life as it is. 2. I am engaged or connected in some way to the society that I live in. 3. I have at least some positive relationships – I am not alone or lonely. 4. My life seems to have a sense of meaning in the context of the world I live in. 5. I feel that I sometimes achieve positive outcomes in my daily activities.

I cannot be sure that my interpretation of Seligman’s theory is correct but I think I might be on the right track. When I look at the five elements, the one I struggle with most is finding meaning in my life. I am, by nature, a bit of a dreamer and often find myself thinking about the meaning or motivation behind aspects of my life. Some people get by without wondering WHY and I do envy them.

I am interested in hearing your thoughts on the Theory of Well-Being as described by Seligman. He has done a significant amount of work with the US Military plus the Education sector. He makes the point that our psychological well-being is at least as important as our physical well-being. I certainly agree with that point of view. What do you think?

cheers

Lorraine